Tag: israel/palestine

The Football Rules of the Israeli/Palestinian conflict:

RULE 1: Israel has the right to play on both sides of the field, but the Palestinians can only play in their own half.

RULE 2: During the match, Israel has the right to build a wall anywhere across the field to enforce the above rule.

RULE 3: Should the referee ever whistle a foul against Israel he shall promptly be denounced as an anti-Semite.

RULE 4: The Palestinians are encouraged to shoot into their own goal. Players who refuse will be nominated as terrorists and will not be allowed to play.

RULE 5: For security reasons, Palestinians do not have the right to pass the ball to each other.

RULE 6: Israel can occupy any empty space on the field by bringing in a new player.

RULE 7: All Israeli goals are valid. Even those scored during the half-time break.

RULE 8: The Palestinians will only receive their sponsorship money if they agree to let Israel win.

RULE 9: The Palestinians can only play in flip-flops.

RULE 10: There will be no goal post on the Israeli side.

Via 7adaara. Thanks, SP.

Maybe you’ve graduated from Fox gun-camera footage to those yee-ha Iraq smackdown vids on Youtube.com (checked out that guard tower footage of Brit soldiers dragging the kids into their compound and beating the crap out of them?).

If so, then this little vacation package might just be for you. It’s put on by a noble Israeli organization that seeks to do nothing but good in this world through … well, let’s let their web-blurb speak (a little polyvalently) for itself:

we are dedicated to providing legal representation and resources for the numerous courtroom struggles, which are being waged in the Israeli, American and European courts on behalf of the Jewish State.

The tour, billed as the “Ultimate Mission,” is priced at around USD2,000 for an “intensive eight day exploration of Israel’s struggle for survival.â€� This includes “Live exhabition [sic] of penetration raids in Arab territoryâ€� and “Inside tour of … secret intelligence bases,â€� not to mention full (kosher) board, a knowledgeable guide and “Luxury bus transportation.”

While the website doesn’t say whether you actually get to place an Arab in a “stress position� or waterboard a Palestinian, you do get to meet “senior Cabinet Ministers� and stay at the Sheraton Plaza in Jerusalem.

Quite how this dovetails with their noble mission of providing the put-upon state of Israel with legal assistance is unclear, but who cares? It’s yee-ha time!

These are naive observations, however: Israel missed and continues to miss opportunities to normalize relations with the Palestinians and with the Syrians not because of mental blocks, but rather because of domestic political considerations. Mahmoud Abbas and Bashar Assad are defined as non-partners not because Ehud Olmert and Amir Peretz have an emotional problem preventing them as partners in dialogue, but because they do not have the political power to do so. The real deterrent factor acting upon Israeli leaders, including Ehud Barak, Bejamin Netanyahu and Ariel Sharon, has come from within the domestic political system: They feared the residents of the Golan Heights and the West Bank settlers more than they did the plotting of Arafat, Hafez Assad and his son. Olmert and Peretz suffer from the same weakness.

There is no way of knowing whether Israel’s willingness to withdraw from the West Bank and the Golan Heights would result in reliable, long-term peace agreements, but it can be confirmed that Israel is largely responsible for the fact that such moves have not been seriously considered or formulated. Israeli governments since 1967 have preferred domestic tranquility over the possibility of unrest on the foreign fronts. Defining the Palestinian and Syrian enemies as non-partners is a direct consequence of that order of priorities.

I would add, as a non-Israeli observer, it is not clear to me that the opposition to changing Israel’s devastating policy towards the territories it occupies and the region at large is only among settlers. As a casual observer of Israeli politics and the Israeli media, it also seems like there’s plenty of support for a maximalist Israel from people within the 1967 borders. I hope I’m wrong.

BRUSSELS (Reuters) – European Union foreign ministers agreed on Friday to back a Palestinian national unity government being formed by President Mahmoud Abbas with the Hamas Islamist movement, despite U.S. misgivings.

“We agreed that we have to support the new Palestinian government. It’s a very important turning point for the situation,” Italian Foreign Minister Massimo D’Alema told Reuters.

While some countries such as France, Finland or Slovakia appear to be ready to accept Hamas in government, others such as the UK, Germany or the Netherlands hesitate, also considering that the Bush administration has not changed its position.

Washington said on Thursday it saw no grounds so far to lift the embargo on contacts and aid.

But many European governments are anxious to end the stand-off, which has contributed to aggravated poverty and lawlessness in the Palestinian territories.

I think it’s a mere question of time when the EU will come to terms with the new reality in Palestinian politics, and in the end the EU’s desire to play a more active role in the region independent from Washington could be the last push to normalize relations with Hamas.